The Signs of Power

It's long been a theory of mine that the more senior you get in an organisation, the less common sense you have. The more powerful you become, the more the simple things in life tend to elude you.

The original clue that led me to form this theory is the kind of sign you see on the inside of the toilet door in the gents lavatory (or quite possibly the ladies, but I wouldn't know about that). In my part of the world, oop t'North (and in an office populated by relatively junior staff) we simply don't have any signs on the toilet doors. You're expected to know what you have to do. Or use your initiative and work it out for yourself (with or without a pencil).

Years ago, when I started travelling down to our offices in the South (which by and large have a higher proportion of more senior staff), I noticed their toilets had twee little signs on the doors saying "Now wash your hands" or, in some cases, "Please leave this toilet in the condition you would wish to find it." This latter instruction is a euphemism aimed at men who...well...need help with their aim, or even worse never learned how to flush a toilet. I learnt that there are, apparently, more of that sort down there than there are up here.

But it wasn't until I visited our headquarters, where the CEO and all his minions hang out, that I saw the sign which caused my theory to gel. Here, the toilet signs read: "Please leave this toilet in the condition you would wish to find it. That means ensuring the toilet rim is dry and anything you have put down the toilet has been flushed away."

You see? It seems that at the seat of power, they don't even know what condition it is preferable to find a toilet in unless it's spelled out for them.

I was reminded of my theory today, as I had occasion once again to visit our HQ. As I was leaving the conference room I noticed the expensive-looking phone was displaying a message on its little screen. Nosy as ever, I bent forwards to see what it said. "Press the 'Phone' button to get a dialling tone." Next time I go, I'm half expecting to see signs beside the door handles: "Depress handle to exit room."