Friday Five

1. Last party you went to?
Ian's 50th. His local had asked him what he wanted and he said "Armarda" (a local band) so they arranged it, and we all had pride of place on the platform in the main room. Great night.

2. Do you pee in the shower?
What a strange question. Of course. Doesn't everybody? ;o)

3. Have you ever fired a gun?
Yes. Started with an air rifle when I was 14, shooting targets and cans in the back garden. When I went up to Uni I spotted a shooting club and thought it would be fun. They used .22 rifles, but after one session I decided I couldn't get on with all the strapping and paraphernalia they made us use. I didn't go back.

4. Where do you call home?
Whalley Range, Manchester. It's the third time I've lived here and this time (I hope) is for keeps. Or at least as long as either of us are fit and healthy enough to live in a large(ish) house and keep it up.

5. What's your favourite board game?
The one I've played most often would have to be Monopoly, but I used to enjoy Cluedo too. We went through a spate with Trivial Pursuit (around the same time everyone else did) but it was never a favourite. As a kid, I loved Ludo and Snakes and Ladders too. I was a bit of a board game nerd in my twenties, and bought loads of interesting-looking new games like Kensington, 2001, and one I can't remember the name of that had stackable pieces which could move one square for each level of the stack. None of them ever really took off in a big way and I gave up trying to find someone to play with after a few years. Sad but true :(

Friday Five

1. What's your weather?
Overcast. Forecast is rain for this morning, brightening up in the afternoon. I'm not usually bothered, but today I'd planned to give the conservatory a coat of woodstain, so I'm holding off for this afternoon. Doesn't LOOK much like rain at the moment thoughbut.

2. Where are you on your way to?
Downstairs to get another coffee (you might have guessed I'm writing this on Saturday morning - does that count as a Friday Five? LOL).

3. Are you good with directions?
Yes. As long as I know where I'm directing someone too, naturally.

4. Do you know your neighbours?
Haven't we had this one before? I know 13 out of 15 of the closest neighbours and socialise with 6 of them on a regular basis (the ones that like to socialise).

5. What do you smell?
The coffee I just fetched. The fresh morning air coming in through the study window. And, when I go downstairs, that funny soil smell I told you about before (but getting fainter now).

Friday Five and we return from The Lakes

Arrived back from a week sharing a farm house with 3 mates and their partners this afternoon. I'll post a link to the travelogue as soon as it's done. For now suffice to say we had four days of glorious weather, followed by an overcast day, a day of rain (which we spent shopping) and a final glorious day yesterday when we walked around Buttermere. Don't think I've been this relaxed in a long, long time.

And so to...the Friday Five
1. Last laugh?
Too many to count this past week. As a group of eight we share such a long and varied history that we can make each other laugh just with a look, or a word. Several themes developed over the week, so after a couple of days we were splitting our sides regularly, and to add to the general hilarity we watched Holy Grail and Life of Brian on a couple of evenings. Brilliant.

2. What do you love?
Ahh...so many things. Sunsets, open water, rain, sunlight through a forest canopy, a long cold gin and tonic with a slice of lime, a hug from my daughters, a quiet evening in with Nikki just *being*, the smell of hot summer tar, trees, bees, pebbles from a clear mountain stream.

3. Gold or silver?
Gold for me.

4. Who do you hold hands with?
Nikki.

5. Friday fill-in:
There's no time to ____.
stand and wait, I hurry to procrastinate.

Friday Five

1. Are you a good worker?
If I'm interested in the task, yes. I'll match all those clichéd phrases - go the extra mile; give 110%; work all hours God sends; burn the midnight oil - you name it, I'll do it if I love the work. If it's boring, or I don't feel appreciated, or it's work I think will be wasted, ignored, or shelved, then I'm not going to put myself out. Been there too many times in the past.

2. What do you carry?
About five stones in excess flab. A lifetime's experience. The world on my shoulders (but I hide it well). Enough dreams to sink a battleship and enough love to float it again. Oh...hang on. You mean my laptop bag, don't you?

3. Do you know your neighbours?
Yes! As regular readers will know, for the first time in "thirty years" I DO know my neighbours. They're friends, we socialise, we can ask them for help and they us. And you know what? SO many people are surprised by this, I understand why it took me/us so long to find a community like this. They hardly exist any more. Other friends and colleagues say to us "What... you actually TALK to your neighbours?!?" Sad, really, that life is so insular for so many of us.

4. Where do you like to go for a day trip?
Anywhere by the sea is OK with me. Or the Lakes. I don't like city breaks much. Seen one city, seen them all. Although having said that, I enjoyed New York (mostly. For at least some of it, that was "enjoyed" pronounced "endured").

5. What is at your feet?
My PC. That bit of carpet my chair sits on to protect the rest of the carpet from wear (and which insists on creeping to the right and climbing up the side of my PC). One or two bits of junk mail waiting to make their way to the recycle bin.

Friday Five

1. Who do you adore?
Nikki, and my daughters. Nuff said.

2. Who adores you?
Umm, not surprisingly, I think the answer is: Nikki, and my daughters. And my Mum, probably. Anyone else hasn't mentioned it yet (and let's hope it stays that way).

3. What's in your pockets?
Normally, or now? Right now I'm at home wearing trackie bottoms, so nothing. Normally a coin purse, a hanky, car keys and my wallet.

4. Who can you talk with for hours?
Quite a few people, but I don't *usually* like to talk for hours.

5. What sounds great today?
"We're offering you early retirement on full pension."

Friday Five and I'm still alive

A dearth of postings this week on account of me being sick and having almost total lack of energy and enthusiasm. Which is a shame, cos it meant no write-up of Annie's party, or Ian's 50th do in Nottingham (which was a cracker). Can't even bring meself to document them retrospectively at the moment. Maybe later.

And there it was: Friday again. I guess if you wait long enough, it's inevitable, but somehow the wait never seems that long. I did the book meme thing last Friday, so here I am a week behind again. No, a week behind, not a weak behind. God.

1. Describe where you grew up:
A three-bed semi-detached council house in an average suburban street, except that it was a "close" rather than a street. A T-shaped dead end with two circles at the ends of the T's crossbar. Which gave rise to the expression "I'm going to play in the circle," meaning we would play marbles in the inspection covers, or hopscotch, or football, or cricket, or any of the other 50 or so street games I can't remember now. I lived there from ages 0 to 18. I had a 10-minute walk to primary school, a 5-minute bus ride to junior school, and a 35-40 minute walk home from big school (which catered for 11-18s). We had a stream at the bottom of our garden which ran through a wood further down. We used to wade in it, dam it up and generally mess about in the wood, until they dug it up to build houses when I was about 15. There were acres of fields at the back of my house too - as far as the eye could see. They've all been built on now too, but that didn't happen until after I left home.

2. Do you wear any jewelery?
A gold chain, permanently. I have a gold ring too that we bought in Rhodes, but I don't wear it all the time.

3. What do you have too much of?
Stuff that I'm "going to sell on eBay" one of these days.

4. Who is a fool?
Anyone who answers this question, probably!

5. What's your nickname?
Digger. On account of my initials being JCB.

Friday Five

Didn't fancy the last one, so I'm now caught up with these :o)

1. When did you last get lost?
That's a test of memory!! It doesn't usually happen, because mostly I know where I'm going, or have a map, or an atlas, or sat-nav (someone else's, so far). The most recent time I can remember is travelling back to East York from Newmarket one "fateful" night (*vbg*) driving through torrential rain when neither of us really knew which way we were going and, eventually, where we were. We got there in the end though ;o)

2. Have you ever been flying?
Yes, many times. As a passenger, never in anything unusual, although having said that, I have had three VERY memorable flying experiences. In reverse order of size: the 21-seater jump-jet between Toronto and Kingston (both directions); the 10-seater private charter jet that EMC Corporation flew me to Cork in, when they were trying to sell me a storage solution (both directions, with cucumber sandwiches served both times); and the sea-plane from Vancouver Island to Vancouver - 8-seater and just about the most exciting trip I've ever made. One direction only that time, cos I went over on the ferry.

3. Who do you always listen to?
There's no-one I ALWAYS listen to. Nikki and my daughters come closest.

4. When does the day feel long?
Those days when I have to go into the office, and I don't have anything to do, so I have to make it look as if I have something to do. For eight hours. Sheesh.

5. Friday fill-in:
Are we _____ ?
having a cup of tea?

Friday Five

Thank God for Friday Fives, cos there's no news on the flippin' roof today. The whole day was a wash-out, weatherwise.

1. When were you born?
On a Saturday, just before breakfast, in a 20th century November.

2. What's your favorite photograph?
This is a really tough one. Partly because there are so many, but partly because I don't really think of things this way. It's unfair to pick one, and even if I did I'd probably feel different about it the next day. Or hour.

3. What's the longest distance you've run?
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Right.

4. What is familiar?
My home town. Family. Mates. Comfort food. The smell of a spring day. Weekend routine.

5. What do you count on?
Things never being simple.

Friday Five

Paul and I attended the "mandatory first night curry" with the Players last night. Only it turned out to be not quite so mandatory after all, with most of the cast and crew crying off having "already eaten" or "thinking they'll go tomorrow." In the end it was an intimate soiree with four of us in total. If Paul & I hadn't come out specifically for the curry it's certain no-one would have bothered. Added to that, owing to the lateness of the hour we had to use the Azad Manzil: the only curry house that will serve after 11pm and even then they were all stood around the till tutting as we left.

When I first came back to Chorlton 8 years ago Azads was a really good meal. Not sure if it's changed hands, but the quality has gone right off. My "chicken madras," while full of large meaty pieces of breast meat, was soused in an indistinguishable bright red sauce that tasted of nothing but hot. Like they'd simply amalgamated whatever sauces they had left over, and splashed in some chilli essence to bring it up to Madras temperature. Disgusting. I won't be going back there. After years of listening to people say how much better Asian Fusion is, having now tried it twice I have to agree. For a local curry, that's my preference from now on.

After an abnormally long outage caused by various trips and computer kerfuffles on the part of my "source" for these Friday Fives (*wink*), here we are again:

1. What song frequently gets stuck in your head?
I don't have a single ear-worm, but I DO remember being told years ago that the way to clear them was to hum the theme from Hawaii Five-O. And it works! For some reason this song doesn't simply replace the one you had stuck and get stuck itself. It's a bit like mental Febreze!

2. Choose one line from a song that sums up your life thus far.
I drove all night, to get to you. Is that alright?

3. Do you have one all-time favorite song (if so, what is it?) or do you skip around?
I skip around, but in a small pool. In common with most people there are songs that evoke particular memories or times in my life that will always be my favourites (even though in some cases they may not be especially "good" songs!). Some that spring to mind, although not because they are necessarily *more* significant - just the ones I can think of right now - are: Seven Seas of Rhye, Have I Told You Lately That I Love You, Samba Pa Ti, Baker Street, anything from T'Pau's Bridge of Spies.

4. How do you listen to music most often (pod, radio, etc)?
At home: MP3s off the PC*. In the car: short journey - radio; long journey - iPod via iTrip Auto FM broadcast.

5. American Idol: fantastic show or overrated?
Love it. Missed the first two seasons but I've been an avid fan ever since and am currently glued to Season 7. Just a shame the results show airs here two days later than in the US, so we have to stay away from online resources to avoid spoilers.

*Stop Press: Since drafting this, I've bought a Logitech MM50 speaker station for my iPod, so I can use that in the house now too :o)

No showers in the forecast

It's been a week since the plumber put his back out. Still no word. Still no shower. Jinxed, I tell you. Jinked.

This week's Friday Five:

1. Favorite shoes?
Good grief. I'm a bloke. I don't think about shoes until they fall apart. My "favourite" ones are the ones that are closest to the door when I'm on my way out.

2. What time does the sun set near you?
It tends to be around the same time as when it gets dark.

3. Do you like spending time in the sun?
Love it.

4. Do you burn or tan?
What a ridiculous question. *No-one* needs to burn if they take it slowly enough. Most people don't, but that doesn't mean it's inevitable, no matter what your "skin type." And it hacks me off when you get back from holiday and people say you've got a "nice sunburn" when they mean tan.

5. Monopoly: yay! or no way!
Used to be a yay! (ahh, those Monopoly weekends. Where did they go?) Last few times I've played it, it's been boring as all hell. Don't suppose I'll play again. Unless I have grand-kids one day...

Friday Five and more shower shenanigans

As you know, we've been having problems with our shower. As if we didn't have enough trouble when it was being fitted. Then they sent the wrong replacement. You might thing the blimmin' thing is jinxed. Well, good as their word the suppliers dropped off the (correct!) replacement unit last week and I'd arranged for our plumber to call today to fit it.

Only he was late.

So I called him. He's put his back out. He won't be able to come until next Friday. So we've another week of baths to look forward to. I use the phrase "look forward to" loosely, as I am very definitely NOT a bath person. Hmph.

1. What are you set on?
Being published. Eventually.

2. What do you have to do right?
Just about everything, lol. But especially writing. I kick myself if I slip up in a public forum and write "there" instead of "their", or "your" instead of "you're." The kind of thing spellcheckers (which I never use anyway) don't find. I like to have time to review something before posting it, but sometimes if I'm dashing something off I don't have that luxury.

3. Have any kids?
Yes. Two daughters. Both beautiful. Both amazing. Intelligent, witty, charming, thoughtful and capable. And no, I'm not biased.

4. Are you patient?
You wouldn't think so if you sat beside me while I was driving behind one of the many slowpokes or red-light-runners that inhabit Manchester's streets. But in general, yes. Once when I was about 12 or 13 my uncle's lawnmower wasn't working properly. I spent about two hours adjusting the blades until it cut a perfect swathe across his lawn. It didn't feel like I was being particularly patient - just doing the job properly (see above, lol) - but he said he was impressed with how patient I'd been.

5. Friday fill-in:
I know if I put my mind to it ______.
I could do anything.

Friday Five and a Fond Farewell

We went to a leaving do last night. It was a small but select crowd, gathered to say farewell to a colleague with whom I've worked closely for 7-8 years. For most of that time "worked closely" meant that I sat either next to, or near to him while we worked on separate projects, but more recently I worked with him on the (eventually successful) bid that I'm now trying to deliver.

He was also my career manager for much of that time.

And he was the guy with whom I chewed the fat over morning coffee most every day I was in the office.

Looking back I realise that, in all the 30 years (ahem) I've worked for this company (no, honestly. It really is 30 years. The anniversary was January 9th) of all the hundreds of people I've seen leave, I can't honestly say I've been particularly close to any of them. Until now. Steve is a guy it's easy to like. Not everyone's cup of darjeeling it's true, but his heart's in the right place, and he likes people. He brings them together. He has (had) a very strong network in the company, and if you needed a particular skill Steve would know where to find it. But more than that, more than knowing them superficially, or only for what he could get out of them (like so many you meet in large companies), Steve was interested in them as people. In their families. In what was going on in their lives. A true humanist. And a keen intellect. How many people do you know with five - or was it six? - degrees?

What made his leaving all the more poignant was that it wasn't really his choice. He felt manoeuvred into going because of the actions of a very few misguided individuals who happened to be in positions of influence. Most notably his manager. Despite winning multi-million pound bids and gold awards, he was sidelined and unfairly treated, and felt his only recourse was to leave. Even though he's quite looking forward to his new career you could tell he didn't really want to go. Didn't want to cut loose from the network of close connections he's made over the last 13 years.

Anyway it was a good leaving do. We managed quite a sizeable pot (he was well liked, as I said) and therefore some memorable leaving presents. Good luck with the new enterprise Steve, and make sure you keep in touch!

This week's Friday Five is really hard to answer "properly."

1. What are you missing?
So this question requires me to look at things in a "glass half empty" kind of way, whereas mostly I'm a "glass half full" kinda guy. If I'm forced to think that way, there are three big things I'm missing. I really miss living with my daughters. I think about them every day. OK, I know one of them is now at the point where she isn't living at home anyway, but I'm acutely aware of the time I've missed out on. I miss having a job I enjoy. For more than twenty out of the thirty years I've been there, I loved it. For the last 8-9 years it's sucked. Big time. And finally I miss having a holiday in the sun. We did it every year for five years and I loved it every time. Now it's back to big mortgage and reduced income and there's no knowing when we'll be able to do it again.

But like I said, don't get me wrong. I don't dwell on it. Life is good.

2. How do you feel?
I put my hands out and wiggle my fingers. Is there another way? How do you do it? No, but seriously - see above. Life is good. I feel good. Content. Ready.

3. What have you let go?
The past.

4. Who have you hurt?
Well, I'm Sagittarius innit? I speak without thinking. People are bound to get hurt when you're that way. It's not intentional. Actually the older I've got the more I've bitten my tongue. You should see it. It's like a piece of pink lace. On a sadder note, there are people I've hurt deeply, but hopefully, with the perspective of several years, they can see it was the right thing to do. There really is no gain without pain.

5. What do you deserve?
To be believed.

Friday Five

1. What do you need?
Potatoes. Nah, that's just an in joke really. All you need is love, The Beatles reckoned, and I'd go along with that. Throw in a home that you look forward to coming back to at the end of the day, where you feel safe and can entertain family and friends and that'll do me.

2. What won't you share?
I'd share anything, but don't leave it until the last minute to ask. If I get to the point where there's only those nice curled-over crisps left in the bag, you're not having one!

3. What do you hurry through?
The working day. I used to love it, now I can't wait for it to be over.

4. Who is worth waiting for?
The right person. Sometimes the wait can be long. Sometimes you think you've missed them. You haven't. You don't need to stick with someone just because it looks like they're the only thing on offer. If it doesn't feel right, it isn't right. You have to wait a while longer.

5. Friday fill-in:
I can't bear to ______.
be hot.

Friday Five and the conspiracy of fate

Why is it only when you're in a hurry that hold-ups occur?

Like the last two nights - we needed to be home early, scoff some dinner as quickly as possible and rush off to help with the panto. Any "regular" day, Nikki will get out of work up to five minutes after finishing time. Both yesterday and today she's had to take a call at the last minute, and not been out until fifteen minutes later than normal.

Then there's the road to the community hall where the Players play. 99 times out of 100 it's empty. We travel that road innumerable times to go shopping, or into Chorlton, to fetch decorating materials. We even go that way occasionally to the Trafford Centre. It's never busy. Tonight, when we're already running late, we find a learner driver trying to turn out into the main road in front of us, and then when we finally lose her there's a blimmin' taxi in front of us doing a three-point turn! Does my head in.

1. Where do you like to walk?
In the park near where we live. It's a traditional Victorian "urban" park with an avenue of trees and a lake. When I lived in Nottingham I used to like to walk by the river, but somehow I don't fancy doing that beside the Irwell.

2. What does your hair look like?
Like I'm bothered. Short, greasy at the moment because I haven't washed it for a while on account of the shower not working, and with increasing amounts of head showing through.

3. What are you jealous of?
I thought for ages about the answer to this. Jealousy is such a negative emotion that I squash it whenever it arises. If I ever feel it, however briefly, it tends to be when someone achieves something that I've been either wanting or trying to achieve and not yet made it. But that's because it was their turn. Being jealous won't help me get there. So I have a pang, occasionally, and then it goes away.

4. What kind of promises do you make?
How many different kinds are there? I tend not to make promises. I don't like letting people down. But if I commit to doing something then I do it. Sometimes reality gets in the way though.

5. What makes you stare?
Bizarre punkish hair-do's or extraordinary body piercings. And being deep in thought.

Friday Five

1. Tell us something you love:
The smell of new rain on concrete.

2. Tell us something you know to be true:
You will see your loved ones again after you "die."

3. Tell us about someone new in your life:
Umm...I think this is supposed to be about a "special someone" and I don't have anyone "new" in that regard. Except that our relationship is so good that it feels new every day. As far as friends go, I guess the most recent new one would be someone at the book club, but I don't know who the newest one is.

4. Who can you never please?
Ah, there was someone. But she's a distant (bad) memory now.

5. Friday fill-in:
You know I ___.
You know I don't like dark mornings!

Friday Five

1. If you could change your name, what would it be?
When I was twelve I thought my name was boring, so I took the chance of meeting a new friend at a family wedding to tell him my name was Chris. Hours later I could hear this voice shouting "Chris! Chris!" so I looked around to see who he was yelling at. It was me, of course. I decided right then I'd better stick with John, even if it is common.

2. What is the worst name someone has called you?
I can't spell it.

3. If you could meet someone famous, who would it be?
Ha ha! You know my track record with meeting famous people. I'd probably dribble all over them. I wouldn't mind meeting Patrick Stewart though, just so I could bring him home for a coffee and casually say to Nikki "I've brought a friend round to meet you."

4. How do you like to travel home?
I drive, but I don't like it. The one part about going to London that I don't mind is the train journey home. Firstly, it's coming home, and secondly I can relax and read, or play games, or write and not feel guilty about not "working."

5. What kind of phone to you have?
It's an old Sharp. I also have an SPV C600 that I've not transferred over to yet. Basically I pick up Nikki's cast-offs every time she buys a new phone (about every 12-18 months). Each one is better than anything I would pick, so why not? She's more of a gadget girl than I'm a gadget guy.

Friday Five

1. What's the last movie you saw?
When I originally filled this in it was Shall We Dance, but we've moved on a bit since then, past Deja Vu to the fabulous oldies we watched today while wrapping presents: White Christmas and It's A Wonderful Life.

2. Are you gentle?
Like a kitten, baby.

3. Do you sleep with your bedroom door shut?
No. Unless either or both of the girls are in the house. Then we all need our privacy. Oh, and at weekends. Closing it helps keep the streetlights out so we can sleep in longer :o)

4. What's your middle name?
Christopher.

5. Friday fill-in:
I could learn to like ___.
Stephen Fry.


Interesting day today socially. We popped round to the new neighbours for a glass of wine and a mince pie as we'd been invited by Christmas card. It reminded me of us, a year ago. They moved in on almost exactly the same date as us (only this year) so they've been in about 9 weeks and the house is still looking a bit unlived in, if you know what I mean. Like things aren't quite in their right places yet. But the welcome was warm and quite a few of our other neighbours were there, so we expected to pass a pleasant 90 minutes or so before making our excuses to leave in time to prepare for the main event of the evening: mulled wine & mince pies at Jamie & Lise's. That was until conversation turned to what movies we've watched recently and one woman said she was looking forward to seeing The Golden Compass. Our host's demeanour changed instantly. "Oh no, you mustn't," she said seriously. "Philip Pullman hates God and his stories are all about killing God. You might think it's a simple story but the movie makers are doing what they did with Harry Potter... they'll draw you in and then in the final instalment you'll be watching them kill God. Don't go. Spread the word, warn all your friends about it."

Honestly, I thought I'd stepped back into the 11th century or something. We just sat there quietly not really knowing what to say. The usual advice is you shouldn't discuss religion or politics with friends and these were people we'd only known for like an hour. I wasn't about to engage them with any high level discourse on how His Dark Materials is set in a fantasy world and even though they're called daemons they're not actual mythic demons. Not, you know, works of the devil. And I certainly wasn't going to get into a debate about how anyone who believes God is omniscient, omnipotent, the creator of everything, could possibly be worried by a story, even if that story does involve killing God. Actually I think if you look a bit closer it's more likely to be about getting rid of the church, which is a different subject altogether. Anyway we stayed long enough to be polite and slipped unobtrusively away. If they ever find out about the ritual sacrifices, we're done for.

We opted to walk to Jamie & Lise's, because I didn't want to have to watch what I was drinking overmuch and because we didn't really have a feel for how far it is. The answer, surprisingly is "not far." Barely more than a 20-minute walk even allowing for the fact that the pavements were icy and the roads even more so.

We stayed until midnight, until the cockles of our 'earts were well and truly warmed by the wine and the great company, and then walked home again. Surprisingly for that time of night it seemed to have warmed up a bit. The cars that had been unused all day were still rimed with frost but those that had been out at some time hadn't frosted back up again.

Friday Five

1. Are you married?
Not at the moment, although I am in a long-term relationship. With two failed marriages behind me (and the last split particularly acrimonious) I'm kind of phobic.

2. When do your claws come out?
More than anything else the thing that is guaranteed to get me boiling mad and spitting is being accused of something I haven't done. Several nasty examples of this before the age of 10 has made me hyper-sensitive. Often, it doesn't even have to be anything especially important.

3. Have you ever been in a car accident?
Several fender-benders but one really significant and scary event where I hit a patch of black ice, span round twice and rolled over into a ditch. I hung upside down in the seatbelt for a few seconds before releasing the clasp and landing on my head. Dust and grit from the carpets rained down all around me. When I reoriented and pushed the button for the driver's window it opened onto the side of the ditch. Grass. No crawl space whatsoever. I opened the passenger side window and on that side, luckily, the ditch side was angled less steeply. There was a 9-inch gap just big enough for me to pull myself out, which I did - energised by visions of the inverted car exploding in a fireball at any second. When I stepped onto the road I nearly fell over - it was a solid sheet of ice. As my eyes accustomed to the gloom (it was around 6.30am) I noticed another car 30 feet from me which had suffered the same fate. I looked the other way and was just in time to jump out of the way of a third car pirouetting across the road to hit the ditch between me and the first.

When the police brought me back to the car later that day to pick up the rest of my stuff, I could see in the daylight that if I'd left the road 50 yards earlier or later there would have been no ditch to break my fall. A steep embankment fell away 100 feet to the moor below.

4. Who is the last person you held?
Nikki.

5. Describe a time you've gone overboard:
I went literally overboard when three mates and I took a boat on the Norfolk Broads in 1976. We anchored in the middle of a lake and went swimming.

Friday Five and the Swing's alive!

So I had this email the other day from the guy who sits opposite me at work. He knows I enjoy singing and had spotted a request on the company Intranet for a replacement singer to join the staff Swing Band. These guys (and the occasional gal) have been playing together for so long that the name of the band reflects a part of the city where our company no longer has offices. They must have decided it would be too confusing to change the name, or maybe they're just a bunch of nostalgia freaks.

I umm'd and ahh'd for a couple of days before applying. Swing really isn't my favourite genre (although their example tracks mentioned in the advert - Fly Me To The Moon and I've Got You Under My Skin - are familiar enough) and on top of that their rehearsals generally take place on Friday lunchtimes between 12 and 1pm - one of my favourite days for working at home.

In the end I decided there was nothing to lose by auditioning. I didn't expect anything to come of it, and when the organiser - a guy I've worked with on and off for over 25 years - called me to discuss things my expectations sunk even lower. Their regular singer, who's leaving the company, is a woman and Dave was at pains to point out that not only were all the arrangements written up for a female vocal, he would actually prefer to stick with a lady. He probably thinks it brings a touch of glamour to the party. So I was on a loser from the start really. Nevertheless being a fair bloke, he wanted to give anyone who was interested a hearing, and we arranged that I'd attend today and give it a try.

I walked in on rehearsals towards the end, as Dave had intended to ask me to sing with just him accompanying me on piano - mainly so he could transpose the key to suit my voice. However, as roughly 50% of the band were known to me, he felt moved to ask me if I'd like to try singing with them, which I agreed to. We did a few bars of Fly Me To The Moon, which went alright, and then went on to Under My Skin, which proved that I didn't know the song as well as I'd thought!

Practice over, the band packed up and left while Dave stayed behind to try a few more numbers on piano and work out my vocal range so he'd have an idea how much work would be involved in rearranging their pieces. I think the main thing that impressed him was my voice is powerful enough to be heard even over the loudest passages when the brass section is in full flow. Whether or not this will be enough to overcome his preference for the only other candidate - who just happens to be a woman - we'll have to wait to find out.

And so to the Five for this Friday:

1. Who do you owe?
Financially? The mortgage company.
Socially? Everyone whose company I enjoy.
Emotionally? Nikki. For rescuing me.

2. What do you wait for?
A time, which I hope will be before retirement age, when I can give up work. The day job that is, not the "real work" that I love doing.

3. What do you disguise?
Weeping over sad movies (yes, I'm an old softie at heart).

4. Tell us a lie:
What you see is what you get.

5. Friday fill-in:
I can't get enough of ___.
your love, I can't get enough of your love, I can't get enough of your love (Copr. Bad Company)

Friday Five

We're off to the lighthouse on the Great Orme again this afternoon for another long weekend - a reprise of last year's trip. So it's an early Friday Five this week and then a break in transmission until at least Sunday!

1. What is sweet?
When someone pays you a compliment unexpectedly.

2. What hours do you work?
Irregular. If I'm in the office I usually get in around 8.45 and leave around 4.45 in time to pick Nikki up. Then I may have extra stuff to do in the evening. If I'm travelling to meetings then it's not unusual for me to have to leave the house at 4.45am to catch the 5.20 train, and not get back until after 9pm. I try to avoid working weekends though (and am almost always successful!)

3. When do you relax?
The question implies I'm not relaxed when I'm working, which isn't always true. It also implies a lack of activity, which only ever happens when I'm watching TV or sleeping. I "relax" by doing something I enjoy doing, rather than doing something I have to do. So I'm usually "on the go" with something - writing, marking, researching, housework (cooking, washing up, the usual stuff), decorating, planning, etc, but I rarely feel like I don't have "time to relax."

4. How did you learn about the birds and the bees?
I found a Ladybird book on the bookshelf in a junior school classroom when I was 9 that covered the essentials in a kind of "Janet & John" way. A couple of years later I subscribed to a magazine on human biology that went into much greater detail. Then when I was 17 I found a tutor ;o)

5. Friday fill-in:
The good vibes flow ____.
between Friday at 5pm and Sunday shortly after bedtime.