Nothing's ever simple

I should make that my new motto. It certainly means more to me than the real family motto (which, in case you were wondering is "nil nisi cruce") which I learnt as a boy meant "depend only in the cross" but which more recent Internet-based research translates as "nothing unless by the cross." What does that mean then? Presumably something about doing your Christian duty.

Whereas "nothing's ever simple" sums up virtually my entire life. Especially that part of it concerned with home improvements.

We've had the window men here the last two days. That's window *men* which differentiates them from window *man* who did the bathroom and toilet windows. Back in the days when we had a bathroom and toilet. Now, as you know, we have a bathroom *with* a toilet. And some nice new windows.

We like to spread the joy around though, so for the front (aka "spare") bedroom and the study windows we're trying out another firm. Two days for four windows was their original estimate. Since there's two of 'em I thought this was a fair go. Might stretch into Monday, the boss man said, on account of we need three out of four sills replacing too.

When work started on Thursday the estimate was blown out of the water almost immediately, as it took one guy all morning and the beginning of the afternoon to replace one sill. Meanwhile, his mate was stripping the windows. Come the end of the day they had to put all four panes back (admittedly a lot cleaner) so we didn't have a gale blowing through the house all night.

They'd forgotten we needed three panes reglazing too. Two on account of cracks and one bullet hole. Well, we called it a bullet hole for dramatic effect. And because it looked like a bullet hole. Really it was probably just a piece of low-flying grit. The kind of grit that hits an upper-storey window hard enough to leave a hole that looks like it was made by a bullet. I really don't know what went on here before we moved in. Anyway, they had to go out halfway through the day to get the glass, so that slowed things down too.

Yesterday was no better. When he came to reglaze the bullet-ridden pane, the younger of the two guys discovered rain had been getting down behind the putty and the entire bottom section was rotten. Not just soft - the wood had turned almost to powder. So he had to cut out that section and make an insert, fill, sand, paint, etc. It all takes time. And that's how a two-day job turned into a three- or possibly even four-day job. They'll be back on Monday, but since they've only just started on the second two windows, and *both* of those need sill replacements, I can't see this being finished before Tuesday.

To the extent that you can trust online translators like InterTran, my new motto would be rendered as "nusquam est umquam simplex" which sounds suitably whacky. Anything with umquam in it is OK by me. I'll have a gin and tonic please and put a dash of umquam in it.