We went to a leaving do last night. It was a small but select crowd, gathered to say farewell to a colleague with whom I've worked closely for 7-8 years. For most of that time "worked closely" meant that I sat either next to, or near to him while we worked on separate projects, but more recently I worked with him on the (eventually successful) bid that I'm now trying to deliver.
He was also my career manager for much of that time.
And he was the guy with whom I chewed the fat over morning coffee most every day I was in the office.
Looking back I realise that, in all the 30 years (ahem) I've worked for this company (no, honestly. It really is 30 years. The anniversary was January 9th) of all the hundreds of people I've seen leave, I can't honestly say I've been particularly close to any of them. Until now. Steve is a guy it's easy to like. Not everyone's cup of darjeeling it's true, but his heart's in the right place, and he likes people. He brings them together. He has (had) a very strong network in the company, and if you needed a particular skill Steve would know where to find it. But more than that, more than knowing them superficially, or only for what he could get out of them (like so many you meet in large companies), Steve was interested in them as people. In their families. In what was going on in their lives. A true humanist. And a keen intellect. How many people do you know with five - or was it six? - degrees?
What made his leaving all the more poignant was that it wasn't really his choice. He felt manoeuvred into going because of the actions of a very few misguided individuals who happened to be in positions of influence. Most notably his manager. Despite winning multi-million pound bids and gold awards, he was sidelined and unfairly treated, and felt his only recourse was to leave. Even though he's quite looking forward to his new career you could tell he didn't really want to go. Didn't want to cut loose from the network of close connections he's made over the last 13 years.
Anyway it was a good leaving do. We managed quite a sizeable pot (he was well liked, as I said) and therefore some memorable leaving presents. Good luck with the new enterprise Steve, and make sure you keep in touch!
This week's Friday Five is really hard to answer "properly."
1. What are you missing?
So this question requires me to look at things in a "glass half empty" kind of way, whereas mostly I'm a "glass half full" kinda guy. If I'm forced to think that way, there are three big things I'm missing. I really miss living with my daughters. I think about them every day. OK, I know one of them is now at the point where she isn't living at home anyway, but I'm acutely aware of the time I've missed out on. I miss having a job I enjoy. For more than twenty out of the thirty years I've been there, I loved it. For the last 8-9 years it's sucked. Big time. And finally I miss having a holiday in the sun. We did it every year for five years and I loved it every time. Now it's back to big mortgage and reduced income and there's no knowing when we'll be able to do it again.
But like I said, don't get me wrong. I don't dwell on it. Life is good.
2. How do you feel?
I put my hands out and wiggle my fingers. Is there another way? How do you do it? No, but seriously - see above. Life is good. I feel good. Content. Ready.
3. What have you let go?
The past.
4. Who have you hurt?
Well, I'm Sagittarius innit? I speak without thinking. People are bound to get hurt when you're that way. It's not intentional. Actually the older I've got the more I've bitten my tongue. You should see it. It's like a piece of pink lace. On a sadder note, there are people I've hurt deeply, but hopefully, with the perspective of several years, they can see it was the right thing to do. There really is no gain without pain.
5. What do you deserve?
To be believed.
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